face_croppedIf you’re a Christian who is highly sensitive or highly sensitive-gifted, you most likely have pains and struggles related to your sensitivity that aren’t addressed at church. In fact for many of you, church might sometimes even stir up some of these pains and struggles.

The difficulty lies in that while the “not-sensitive” half of the world needs to be regularly challenged and stirred up, the highly sensitive person typically thrives in an atmosphere of unpressured peace.

The good news is that God Himself is wooing His highly sensitive ones into a relaxed, heart-based relationship with Him through Jesus, the Prince of Peace. This is what He has done with me, and this is what I share with you.

This site is not currently active, but the riches I have sown here continue to offer help to the highly sensitive Christian.

I encourage you to give the Holy Spirit permission to lead you on your own personal journey toward growing into the person your Daddy God created you to be. Yours is a wholly unique journey, and nobody can lead you on it better than the beautiful Holy Spirit of the Living God.

  • If you want to know what I believe and who I am, read about me.
  • If you want to capture the foundational concepts here in the quickest way, read the Essentials posts.

I will soon have a place where you can sign up to be notified of new work I will be doing.

Be blessed!

Gail Ruth

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We have a magnificent and unfathomable God who is wrapped in impenetrable mystery.

As believers, we are called to have a love relationship with this infinite God, and that can be a tad daunting if we don’t understand how loving and good He is.

The good news is that Jesus, who came from His Father, revealed an inside look at Father God’s heart throughout His earthly ministry. And it’s a lovely picture He painted for us.

Jesus Reveals the Father

When Jesus’ disciples asked Him to show them the Father, Jesus answered, “If you have seen Me, you have seen the Father” (John 14:9).

Through Jesus, we too can see the Father as He truly is.

The revelation of the Father through Jesus has far more clarity than any previous revelation we have of Him in scripture (Luke 10:22).

Jesus clearly revealed to us what was previously cloaked in mystery. Jesus Himself said that “no one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal Him” (Matthew 11:27).

“If You Have Seen Me…”

Since Jesus said that seeing Him was the same as seeing the Father, let’s look at Jesus to see who the Father is.

Jesus spoke of Himself as gentle and humble of heart (Matthew 11:29). In addition, scripture refers to Him as filled with “exultant joy and gladness” (Hebrews 1:9, Amplified Bible). He must have been loads of fun to be around. The common people were drawn to Him. And He happily associated with the most disreputable of society. He was called a “friend of sinners” (Matthew 11:19).

The tone of Jesus’ speech is revealed in Luke 4:18 when Jesus announced His mission from the pages of the Old Testament prophet Isaiah. He spoke of “preaching the gospel to the poor”. “Preaching the gospel” is a single word in the Greek, and is the same word that was used when the angels brought the “tidings of great joy” at Christ’s birth (Luke 2:10). It means to bring good news of any kind and to announce glad tidings.

Just imagine this exultantly joyful Jesus travelling around proclaiming glad tidings everywhere He went, and saying His message was from God His Father.

Jesus was completely approachable on earth, and He is still approachable today. We are told that He is our compassionate High Priest who can relate to us in our struggles (Hebrews 4:15). He is still modelling the Father to us.

Direct Teachings About the Father

Here are a few things the scriptures say regarding the Father:

  • The hallmark of the Father’s character is love — pure, agape love (I John 4:8; I Corinthians 13:4-7).
  • Jesus said His Father is kind even to evil and ungrateful people (Luke 6:35).
  • Scripture says that “every good and perfect gift comes from the Father” (James 1:17). He is the Source of everything good.
  • Scriptures explain that the Holy Spirit cries out from our hearts calling, “Daddy!”, which models the kind of relationship we are to have with the Father (Romans 8:15; Galatians 4:6).

How loving and good our Father God is! And Jesus, the only procreated offspring of His Father, told us we have the right to call His Father our Father. What a blessing!

My Blessing To You

May the revelation of Jesus further open your eyes and your heart to Father God. I bless your pursuit of a heart-based love relationship with your unfathomable heavenly Daddy.

Be blessed.
Gail Ruth

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Is it sad that a gazelle does not fly?
Or that a sparrow is not fleet of foot?
Shall I grieve for the squirrel that does not swim to the depths?
For the otter that does not play in the treetops?
Or shall I simply marvel at the astounding creation around me,
Celebrating a spectrum of life whose experiences I will never be able to comprehend?

Making Peace With Yourself

Many of us are on a journey of discovering our uniqueness, growing into an acceptance of who we are, and learning to adapt our lives and expectations accordingly. And it’s so easy to think the goals of this journey are to embrace who we are, build a life suited for our type, live out our relaxed, loving relationship with God, and accomplish good work on this earth.

But we can do all that and still live in a haunted state of alienation and disconnection. And that hurts our hearts terribly.

I believe we will never be able to truly make deep peace with ourselves if it is only about us and our kind.

The Goal of the Uniqueness Journey

The end purpose of growing into who we were created to be is not to simply make peace with who we are, but

  • to intertwine our life with certain safe others who are vastly different from us,
  • to accept them in their unfathomable foreignness,
  • to consider them with honor and harmony,
  • and to grow in peace with them as much as is up to us.

We highly sensitive people profoundly need less sensitive people in our lives. And those less sensitive people profoundly need us. But neither of us ever need to look or function like the other.

But It’s Really Hard

Honoring someone in their differences sounds like an inspiring, reasonable thought. But it’s much harder to put into practice than it sounds. Much harder.

The sad fact is when we human beings look at other people who are different from us, we tend to see defect, not difference. And we rarely recognize their treasure.

The truth is it’s far easier to see flaw than treasure.

Why It’s So Hard

Let me explain one reason for this. As human beings, we don’t often truly experience what it’s like to be anybody but ourselves. Some of us get glimpses, but others get none. And because our own lives are all we’ve ever experientially known, we don’t tend to comprehend that what we do so naturally and effortlessly is a strength, and that that strength is a gift.

Instead, we see our strengths as Normal Human Default Mode. In fact, the easier something is for us, the more likely we are to see it as “just something people do”, with “people” meaning everybody, and “do” implying expectation.

And so we measure people by whether they properly measure up to what we believe is Normal Human Default Mode. And approve and disapprove accordingly.

Those who are fundamentally different from us fail to share our default settings. And we tend to see such lack in an unflattering light, whether we call it unenlightenment, immaturity, character flaw, defect, failure, stubbornness, rebellion, or whatever.

One Man’s Story

I once spoke with a highly sensitive, creative man who had a great drive to develop his human potential and what he called his “spirituality”. He was broken-hearted that his wife wasn’t pursuing her own spiritual potential. She just liked to do stuff. As he described her, I recognized an extroverted “doer” kind of person. She was highly social, had lots of friends, liked being out, was not happy spending much time alone — basically the total opposite to him.

He explained how she had failed to respond to his efforts to help her grow spiritually. He interpreted her behaviors as total failure to be in Normal Human Default Mode. And he determined his marriage was in great trouble, and that she was the source of that trouble. He had persisted in the marriage because he has been convinced that ultimately she would change into the person he knew she should be.

When I met him, he was in great crisis because he had begun to fear she might never change. And to him, that meant the marriage was over.

My heart grieved as I listened to his fixed belief that there was only one acceptable way to be in this world, and that the only hope for relationship with his wife was if she measured up to his default mode.

An Treasure-Seeking Alternative

I would like to suggest that when we look at someone who fails to function in our default mode, we develop a different mindset.

When faced with the absence of a familiar, comfortable behavior in someone else, we can search out the less familiar treasure God has put into them.

So in this man’s situation, he could have said, “Well, my wife doesn’t have my spiritual appetite. If somehow (unbelievably) she wasn’t designed to have that appetite (could it even be possible?), what does she have that could be called a strength?”

And if he had eyes to see, he would have at least seen a loving, connected heart and a woman who served him by holding down most of the household chores, allowing him to retreat into his creative work undisturbed. And he could have blessed those things in her and built a relationship with her that made light of their differences and honored their opposite strengths.

What the Process Entails

So the next time someone violates your belief of how people are supposed to function, ask yourself, “If they don’t have that behavior, what good thing is present?” And go on a treasure hunt. And in so doing you will counterintuitively be making progress toward making peace with yourself.

You may need to ask Jesus to give you His eyes, because it can be quite the process to humbly learn to value what God considers the treasure in someone else.

As you practice this, I can’t promise anyone will receive your gift of honor. And unfortunately you really can’t expect a particular person to reciprocate your treasure-seeking eyes, so please don’t cast your precious self in front someone who is not able to value you.

It’s not about changing the way the world sees each other, or even about how the world sees us. It’s about a shift in our own hearts that will change how we see and value other people. And in the process, usher in a greater healing into our own hearts that just might be contagious.

Blessings,
Gail Ruth

A Look at the Scriptures

Romans 14:4
Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.

I Corinthians 12:14-26
For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. If all were a single member, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, yet one body.

The eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you,” nor again the head to the feet, “I have not need of you.” On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another.

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Just a Spoonful of Sugar – Sanctification for the Highly Sensitive Christian

December 31, 2010

I don’t speak for the other 80-some percent of the world, but with highly sensitive people, the Holy Spirit Himself escorts us into and through the most lovely seasons of cleansing. When He does, He is very specific, very effective, and very kind. And it feels so good to get free.

With us highly sensitive types, the Holy Spirit’s way is to address our stuff in manageable, bite-size pieces. One very specific bite at a time. AND the tiny bites are all sweetened with His warm, loving regard and kind patience. It’s like Mary Poppins where “a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down… in the most delightful way”.

The post concludes with a deeper look at the scriptural basis for these concepts.

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Health, Healthcare, & the Highly Sensitive Person

November 30, 2010

a slide presentation about the highly sensitive person and healthcare concerns. It’s targeted at both patients and providers. It has a bit of review about the trait of high sensitivity, some information about the special health needs of highly sensitive people, and then advice for healthcare providers and patients.

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Transition, Growth, & the Calm Kindliness of God

October 7, 2010

As much as we would like it to be otherwise, we usually can’t see growth happening in the moment. It happens too slowly and the process is too hidden. And that can make it easy to feel discouraged with ourselves. It can so help to understand that transitional seasons are important times of our life and are fodder for the Holy Spirit to work His transformation in our hearts and lives. Best of all, it’s at such times we have an opportunity to practice our faith in our very good God, that our Good Shepherd is and will continue to be calmly and kindly gentle with our hearts on this journey, because that’s just how He is with us highly sensitive people.

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God Loves You Dearly. Yes, You.

September 22, 2010

Just a reminder that God loves you dearly. Yes, you. Yeah, her too, but you. You. Just like you are. There’s nothing you can do to make Him love you more or to make Him love you less. He just loves. It’s Who He Is. And you’re the target of that love.

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Highly Sensitive in a Not So Sensitive World

July 11, 2010

What exactly is the trait of high sensitivity? And how do we make sense of this less sensitive world we live in? When we try to keep pace with the lives and expectations of less sensitive people, we squander our gifts and hide our light under the proverbial bushel.

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A Highly Sensitive Fish Story: It’s OK to Need a Gentle, Personal Touch

June 23, 2010

A guest post by Elissa Starks. “I am coming to the realization there are those that need a little more personal touch.. This really hit home at a visit to an aquarium. Some of us are just made differently and that is not a bad thing…”

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Highly Sensitive People, Christian Culture, & a Lost Language of Intimacy with God

May 16, 2010

Isn’t it amazing how time can turn everything on its head and send a completely different message? The culture changes, the language changes, and what used to mean one thing comes to mean the complete opposite. I suggest it is the highly sensitive population that’s been most severely affected by this loss of intimacy with God in Christian culture. If you have a history in the church, this just might shift something deep inside you and enrich your relationship with God forever.

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Do You Feel Different From Other Christians?

May 2, 2010

People whose created design falls outside the cultural norm in any time or place can have a difficult time growing into the people God created them to be. I’d like to suggest that maybe your weaknesses can be signposts that something wonderful lies hidden deep inside.

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